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Who am I? The Parent Role Post B'nai Mitzvah
| Author | |
| Date Added |
There is a traditional blessing said over a Bar or Bat Mitzvah by parents, that shares the idea that once the service is over, parents are no longer responsible for their child’s actions. What is so interesting is that saying these words seems like, “Phew! Finally, I can take a deep breath; my child is responsible for all his actions. I can take a break!”
However, that’s not really true. You will still say “no” to sleepovers that are on a school night, help your child plan to study for finals and help talk with your child about friendship drama. You are still that person your child needs, but in a very different way.
On this journey, you become the parent who listens, helps guides, listens more and helps your child navigate a personal and unique path supported by you. It means that with your child you work out a schedule to practice his Torah portion, but don’t nag. It means that you involve your child in picking out all parts of the service, including the readings, and you honor her opinion.
After the big day, you speak to your child like a friend or an adult, and be there to listen when there’s been a bad day. You offer advice or create boundaries if your child is struggling and needs order, but without yelling or making it about you. You won’t yell, it never works anyways, and you’ll be sure to make time to listen; even if it’s about Instagram posts or the drama that day during history class. It’s all part of the story.
You will become your child’s partner in life, but your child’s choices are her own. Her life is her own. His story is his own. Your story just happens to be parallel in this life - that’s amazing! In this part of the service where you give your blessing, you are celebrating your child and her individual journey in connection to yours. It’s important to note the difference.
Tue, February 25 2020
30 Shevat 5780
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Tuesday ,
FebFebruary 25 , 2020The World of Dreams Series
Tuesday, Feb 25th 7:00p to 8:30p
The World of Dreams In Hebrew, we speak of “opening” a dream, which our sages likened to an unopened letter. In this series of classes, we will examine our dreams in the tradition of my teacher, Mme. Colette Aboulker-Muscat, who inherited this practice from her family and developed it in advanced study. She not only taught us ways to “open” our dreams, but also ways to “repair” dreams that require tikkun, by a practice called “waking dream”. In preparation for this class, I suggest the following: Put a new unlined notebook and pen or pencil by your bed. Before going to sleep, write the following day’s date at the top of the page. Reach for it the next morning as soon as you waken, and write or draw whatever you remember. Full sentences are not required. Eve Ilsen is a psychotherapist and rabbinic pastor. She has lived, worked and learned in New York, Philadelphia, California, Alaska and Israel. She learned to work with imagery and waking dream daily with Mme. Colette Aboulker-Muscat in Jerusalem for four years. Returning to the States, she spearheaded the Wisdom School with her late husband, Reb Zalman Schachter-Shalomi, and taught in tandem with him as well as her own classes. -
Thursday ,
FebFebruary 27 , 2020Psalms Brown Bag Series with Rabbi Diane Tiferet Lakein
Thursday, Feb 27th 12:00p to 1:00p
Ivdu et Hashem b’Simcha – Let us serve YHVH with joy! (Psalm 100: 2) Psalms Brown Bag Series with Rabbi Diane Tiferet Lakein: Nevei Kodesh, Thursdays 12 – 1pm February 13, 20, 27, March 5 $10 Nevei Kodesh members/$12 guests This lunchtime brown bag series will explore four different psalms as a way into both a richer understanding of the Jewish traditional texts and a deeper appreciation of our own souls’ yearnings.* Over the centuries, the redactors of our prayer books (siddurim) have chosen particular psalms as part of the standardized liturgy, and contemporary communities have highlighted and elevated others through chants and songs. And yet there is so much more to uncover! My hope is that we will come to build a sense of community through our sustained exploration of different psalms together over time. I also pray that our engagement with a variety of psalms will offer a window into the tremendous richness to be found in these traditional texts of prayer. *No Hebrew is required. The texts will be provided both in Hebrew and in traditional and alternative English translations, including those of Rebbe Zalman himself. Drop-ins are welcome. -
Tuesday ,
MarMarch 3 , 2020The World of Dreams Series
Tuesday, Mar 3rd 7:00p to 8:30p
The World of Dreams In Hebrew, we speak of “opening” a dream, which our sages likened to an unopened letter. In this series of classes, we will examine our dreams in the tradition of my teacher, Mme. Colette Aboulker-Muscat, who inherited this practice from her family and developed it in advanced study. She not only taught us ways to “open” our dreams, but also ways to “repair” dreams that require tikkun, by a practice called “waking dream”. In preparation for this class, I suggest the following: Put a new unlined notebook and pen or pencil by your bed. Before going to sleep, write the following day’s date at the top of the page. Reach for it the next morning as soon as you waken, and write or draw whatever you remember. Full sentences are not required. Eve Ilsen is a psychotherapist and rabbinic pastor. She has lived, worked and learned in New York, Philadelphia, California, Alaska and Israel. She learned to work with imagery and waking dream daily with Mme. Colette Aboulker-Muscat in Jerusalem for four years. Returning to the States, she spearheaded the Wisdom School with her late husband, Reb Zalman Schachter-Shalomi, and taught in tandem with him as well as her own classes. -
Thursday ,
MarMarch 5 , 2020Psalms Brown Bag Series with Rabbi Diane Tiferet Lakein
Thursday, Mar 5th 12:00p to 1:00p
Ivdu et Hashem b’Simcha – Let us serve YHVH with joy! (Psalm 100: 2) Psalms Brown Bag Series with Rabbi Diane Tiferet Lakein: Nevei Kodesh, Thursdays 12 – 1pm February 13, 20, 27, March 5 $10 Nevei Kodesh members/$12 guests This lunchtime brown bag series will explore four different psalms as a way into both a richer understanding of the Jewish traditional texts and a deeper appreciation of our own souls’ yearnings.* Over the centuries, the redactors of our prayer books (siddurim) have chosen particular psalms as part of the standardized liturgy, and contemporary communities have highlighted and elevated others through chants and songs. And yet there is so much more to uncover! My hope is that we will come to build a sense of community through our sustained exploration of different psalms together over time. I also pray that our engagement with a variety of psalms will offer a window into the tremendous richness to be found in these traditional texts of prayer. *No Hebrew is required. The texts will be provided both in Hebrew and in traditional and alternative English translations, including those of Rebbe Zalman himself. Drop-ins are welcome. -
Friday ,
MarMarch 6 , 2020'Nava Tehila' Style Services, led by Rav Bracha and Yoel Sykes
Friday, Mar 6th 7:00p to 9:00p
Led by Yoelle Sykes and Rav Bracha: Come as you are and join a musical Kabbalat Shabbat journey that will invite us to travel into the landscape of holiness and joy. Through chanting Psalms and Shabbat prayers with original melodies and guided intentions, we will connect to the spirit and allow it to fill our hearts, uplift our souls and welcome the Shabbat. This Shabbat we are joined by amazing levitical musicians such as Kendall Perry, Sandra Wong, and Sheldon Sands, among others. Families are welcome* - with childcare also available in the building - and we conclude by 8:45 with light oneg refreshments and home-baked challah. **childcare for the duration of the service is provided free of charge. -
Monday ,
MarMarch 9 , 2020A Mad (Hatter) Purim Celebration
Monday, Mar 9th 7:00p to 11:00p
Maariv (evening service) Followed by a theatrical and full Megilla reading (there may or may not be puppets) followed by break fast nosh and drink and a DJ-spinning ALICE IN WONDERLAND THEMED dance party! Elaborate costumes encouraged. This event is open to people of all ages. BYOB -
Tuesday ,
MarMarch 10 , 2020The World of Dreams Series
Tuesday, Mar 10th 7:00p to 8:30p
The World of Dreams In Hebrew, we speak of “opening” a dream, which our sages likened to an unopened letter. In this series of classes, we will examine our dreams in the tradition of my teacher, Mme. Colette Aboulker-Muscat, who inherited this practice from her family and developed it in advanced study. She not only taught us ways to “open” our dreams, but also ways to “repair” dreams that require tikkun, by a practice called “waking dream”. In preparation for this class, I suggest the following: Put a new unlined notebook and pen or pencil by your bed. Before going to sleep, write the following day’s date at the top of the page. Reach for it the next morning as soon as you waken, and write or draw whatever you remember. Full sentences are not required. Eve Ilsen is a psychotherapist and rabbinic pastor. She has lived, worked and learned in New York, Philadelphia, California, Alaska and Israel. She learned to work with imagery and waking dream daily with Mme. Colette Aboulker-Muscat in Jerusalem for four years. Returning to the States, she spearheaded the Wisdom School with her late husband, Reb Zalman Schachter-Shalomi, and taught in tandem with him as well as her own classes. -
Saturday ,
MarMarch 14 , 2020CTR 2 Shabbaton
Shabbat, Mar 14th 10:00a to 5:30p
10am - attend services 12pm - lunch 1pm - 4pm - electives 4pm - attend Torah study with parents -
Tuesday ,
MarMarch 17 , 2020Hebrew and a Taste of the World to Come: An Interactive Journey Through Gender, Music and Mysticism with Eyal Rivlin
Tuesday, Mar 17th 7:30p to 9:00p
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Tuesday ,
MarMarch 24 , 2020The World of Dreams Series
Tuesday, Mar 24th 7:00p to 8:30p
The World of Dreams In Hebrew, we speak of “opening” a dream, which our sages likened to an unopened letter. In this series of classes, we will examine our dreams in the tradition of my teacher, Mme. Colette Aboulker-Muscat, who inherited this practice from her family and developed it in advanced study. She not only taught us ways to “open” our dreams, but also ways to “repair” dreams that require tikkun, by a practice called “waking dream”. In preparation for this class, I suggest the following: Put a new unlined notebook and pen or pencil by your bed. Before going to sleep, write the following day’s date at the top of the page. Reach for it the next morning as soon as you waken, and write or draw whatever you remember. Full sentences are not required. Eve Ilsen is a psychotherapist and rabbinic pastor. She has lived, worked and learned in New York, Philadelphia, California, Alaska and Israel. She learned to work with imagery and waking dream daily with Mme. Colette Aboulker-Muscat in Jerusalem for four years. Returning to the States, she spearheaded the Wisdom School with her late husband, Reb Zalman Schachter-Shalomi, and taught in tandem with him as well as her own classes.
Tue, February 25 2020 30 Shevat 5780